This is Your Boudoir Shoot. Stop Comparing Yourself to Others | New England Boudoir
When it comes to having self-confidence, you are equally as capable as the woman standing next to you.
Can I look that confident in my photos? Is my body good enough to be photographed like that? Will people think I look silly? These pictures all look so beautiful but what if I do this and hate my photos?
Guess what? You’re not the first person to wonder about these questions. We’re all human and getting ready to do something that is not within your everyday routine and within your normal comfort zone can be nerve-wracking. I do want to caution you to stop yourself from being consumed by them because that’s easily done.
If the ultimate goal with this experience is to learn to love yourself and feel more empowered to be more comfortable in your own skin then comparing yourself to others is doing a disservice to yourself.
When it comes to having self-confidence, you are equally as capable as the woman standing next to you.
I do understand it’s not that simple.
Comparing ourselves to others is a common practice and while there does exist some positive things that come from making comparisons, it is often more damaging to ourselves from doing so. Why? You will never get anywhere by comparing your biggest insecurities to someone else’s greatest successes. And — there is never going to come a time where there isn’t at least someone doing “it” better than you. Above all- you are entirely too unique to ever be compared fairly.
If nothing else, comparing yourself to others will only deprive you of your own self love and deprive you of experiencing your own joy when you DO succeed.
This is YOUR boudoir shoot and no one is going to do it like you do! And while most of us have similar insecurities we all overcome them in our own way on our own time-line.
If you are having these questions as you are deciding whether or not to do a shoot and find yourself consumed by comparisons here is what you can do instead:
Set your intention.
Why do you want to do a shoot like this? Remind yourself that becoming more comfortable in your own skin doesn’t mean you have to change it to be more like someone else. Figure out who YOU are, what makes YOU feel good and do more of that.
If you do look towards examples for inspiration:
choose images of women who have a similar body type to yours. This will reduce distractions that trigger negative thoughts. Things like “That would never work for me because my boobs aren’t that big, or my waist isn’t that tiny” can limit your ability to see yourself experiencing the same joy. Seeing someone who has a similar body type to you can give you more realistic expectations and show you the beauty that is uniquely possible for you.
If you see someone or something that you admire don’t assume she has it better just because she IS better.
We are all the same kind of different and there is no magic button for anyone. Shift your focus onto what they did to get where they are and introduce some of those concepts into your own self love journey. What I mean by that is, you can pull inspiration from others without overanalyzing whether or not you measure up to them. Instead of saying “That girl looks incredible - I could never look that good” recognize that she didn’t become that confident overnight. Chances are she too took active steps to get there. Let her success drive you but don’t let your like-ness or differences it be a qualifier of whether or not you get to have this too.
